If you're heading to a Halloween party this weekend and don't have a costume yet, here are five last-minute topical costumes you can throw together with one quick trip to the store:
#1.) HONEY BOO BOO. Get a bright pink tutu, a curly blonde wig, and a lot of makeup. You can even skip the tutu part and just grab a quick outfit at Kmart.
#2.) PSY. Even if you don't have a bright-colored suit you can pull this off. Just wear ANY suit, a black bowtie, and sunglasses. And get ready to do the "Gangnam Style" dance with the 500 other people dressed as Psy.
#3.) CLINT EASTWOOD. Wear a suit, hike up your pants, spray your hair gray, and carry a chair around. Plus that way you'll have a seat at all times.
#4.) "MAGIC MIKE". If you can pull it off . . . do it. If some of your friends can pull it off and you can't, go as a stripper who hasn't stripped yet.
#5.) ENDEAVOUR SHUTTLE TRANSPORT. Paint a refrigerator box white, strap it to your back, and walk around bumping it into things because it's way too wide to fit anywhere.
Four Last-Minute Halloween Costumes to Avoid:
#1.) Backwards Man. It's when you just wear normal clothing, but backwards. So, backwards pants, shirt, and hat. People have been doing it for DECADES, and it's still not funny.
#2.) A Ghost. Wearing a sheet with two eyeholes works when you're FIVE. But once you're not three feet tall anymore, it's a TON of fabric . . . which tends to get snagged on things and not stay in place. Not to mention, you have to figure out a way to make the eyeholes stay in the right spot. And if you're wearing a sheet to a party, no one will know who's under it.
#3.) An Inanimate Object. To be a lamp, all you really need to do is put a lampshade on your head and wear all one color. Or for a table, you can just cut a hole through a piece of cardboard and wear it around your neck . . . then glue things on it, like Chap Stick or a cardboard clock. The problem is, most people who dress up like objects don't look very good. And if you're making your costume last-minute, it'll DEFINITELY be bad. Plus, those kind of costumes aren't very comfortable, so you'll probably end up taking it off.
#4.) A Hobo. This one isn't on the list, but it should be. All you need for it is some old clothing, and maybe some stubble. But dressing up like a homeless person just isn't PC anymore. Especially if you're well off.
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